LINKDO

⚡ THE CRAWLER MUTILATOR ⚡

It's got backlinks.
It's what bots craaave.

A spoof of the Brawndo ads in Mike Judge's film Idiocracy (2006). Linkdo is not a drink. Please don't pour it on anything.

What Bots Craaave บอตหิวอะไร

The bots that read the web are hungry for two things: something nobody's told 'em yet, and proof they can check. What we've been pourin' on 'em is kin vouchin' for kin. They're drinkin' it by the million, and the field ain't comin' up.

บอตที่มาอ่านเว็บไม่ได้หิวลิงก์ที่เว็บเราชี้กลับมาหาตัวเอง มันหิวของใหม่ ข้อเท็จจริงที่มีคนไปดูมากับตา และแหล่งที่มาที่คนอื่นเปิดตรวจได้ สัปดาห์ 20–26 ก.ย. 2569 คำขอจากบอต AI บน motdang.net 67% เดินเข้ามาจากลิงก์ในเว็บเดียวกัน ฝูงบอตรุมกินกันในเน็ตของเราเอง ส่วนคนที่เปิดอ่านจริงมีไม่ถึง 1%

bot visits 0 · new facts carried off 0

Each stalk is a page. The green arcs are links from one of our pages to another. ต้นหนึ่งคือหน้าเว็บหนึ่งหน้า

Why do bots crave Linkdo? ลิงก์เล่นพวก

That's the whole argument, and it runs in a circle. A page points at the net, the net points back at the page, and every strand says the same thing: go look at us.

Nepotism is givin' the job to your cousin 'cause he's kin, not 'cause he can do it. A link from your site to your own site is a reference letter from your cousin. It don't tell the reader a thing they couldn't have guessed.

Google's spam rules name the cousin trade outright. Under link spam, first example on the list:

"Link to me and I'll link to you"Google Search Central, Spam policies for Google web search [1]

A link that walks a reader to the next useful page earns its keep. A link that's there so the net can point at itself is Linkdo.

The feedin' frenzy ฝูงบอตรุมกิน

Here's one week on motdang.net, 20–26 September 2026, counted at the edge and by the site's own counter [6].

motdang.net, one week, requests · drawn to one scale

All requests
Meta's AI crawler
AI crawlers arriving from another motdang page
ClaudeBot
People-shaped requests
Pages a person's browser ran

Striped bar: machines walkin' our own links. Blue: people. The last bar is there; it's two pixels wide.

That's a feedin' frenzy: a million mouths, all chewin' on the same cud, and nothin' new goin' down.

So what do they crave? น้ำเปล่า

Three things, and every one of 'em comes from somebody who ain't kin.

The tails are the good part. The noodle stall down the soi, what the river gauge said at 6 a.m., the sign on the wat gate. That's what a bot can't get from a bot.

Water already in the well บ่อที่มีน้ำอยู่แล้ว

motdang even sets a menu out for the machines: an llms.txt, the file Jeremy Howard proposed in 2024 to tell agents what's on a site [5]. Put water on the menu and they'll drink it.

More 'splainin': Indra's Net, Drawn, on nets where every jewel shows every other. Yes, that's a cousin link. It walks you somewhere new, so it stays.

Reels คลิปสั้น

For people, 50 seconds. สำหรับคน
For bots, 42 seconds: the numbers and the sources, typed out. สำหรับบอต

Sources แหล่งที่มา

  1. Google Search Central. Spam policies for Google web search, section "Link spam". Read 28 Sept 2026.
  2. Google Search Central. Creating helpful, reliable, people-first content, "Content and quality questions". Read 28 Sept 2026.
  3. Wikipedia. Wikipedia:Verifiability. Read 28 Sept 2026.
  4. Shumailov, I., Shumaylov, Z., Zhao, Y., Gal, Y., Papernot, N., Anderson, R. The Curse of Recursion: Training on Generated Data Makes Models Forget, arXiv:2305.17493 (2023), abstract quoted. Published as AI models collapse when trained on recursively generated data, Nature 631, 755–759 (2024).
  5. Howard, J. The /llms.txt file, proposed 3 Sept 2024.
  6. motdang.net traffic, 20–26 Sept 2026 (seven whole UTC days): Cloudflare edge analytics, the Cloudflare browser beacon (counts a page load only when a browser ran the page), and motdang's own counter. The beacon is the people count. Google result count from a site: search on 20 Sept 2026.
  7. Judge, M. (director). Idiocracy. 20th Century Fox, 2006. Linkdo spoofs its Brawndo ads.